Home/Women's Lifestyle/O, The Oprah Magazine/May 2018/In This Issue
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018United They StandElsie Larson and Emma Chapman, Authors“FAST OR FANCY,” PAGE 146The person who always helps us see another side of things is…each other. Even though we’re sisters, we’re opposites in many ways, so we learn a lot from one another. We’ll never change our views on…equality for everyone. No exceptions.Raul Colón, Illustrator“SIREN SONG,” PAGE 111One thing we all can agree on is…that we’re all in pursuit of happiness. But it can’t be based on indifference to the plight of others. A disagreement that changed my perspective was…the day I broke from my family members’ hope that I’d become a minister. Following my own dreams allowed me to express my spiritual side through the language of art.Cathryne Keller, Senior associate editor“REFRESH!,” PAGE 103One thing we all can agree on is…that everything is…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018SHARING CIRCLEFACE ITIn our March issue, actor Terry Crews got candid about toxic masculinity—and how he escaped it.“This was so powerfully moving. Imagine all men leading their families with the ultimate respect and devotion to their wives.”—Tanya Rose Thimis“Terry, you’re a true man!”—Carolyn Means“It takes a great deal of courage to appear ‘weak’ within a macho culture. Terry’s words are refreshing and affirming.”—Greg LaraLETTER OF THE MONTHJane Ratcliffe’s essay “Father Knew Best,” about how her dad helped her get through an undiagnosed health issue, touched my soul. I’ve been overwhelmed by my husband’s mysterious illness, which has gone without a diagnosis for more than a decade. We’ve both questioned our sanity through a maze of specialists and well-meaning friends who have offered us hope but no answers. Now I know that…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018SWEET RELEASEMOTHER’S DAY GIFTS come in all forms, from breakfast in bed to a hot-stone massage. But some moms desperately wish for something simpler: the chance to hug their kids. Of the approximately 100,000 women in local U.S. jails, a staggering two-thirds are women of color; an estimated 80 percent are mothers, most single parents; and many of them (including those arrested for nonviolent offenses like changing lanes without signaling) await trial behind bars because they can’t afford to post bail. “That’s what makes this system so harmful,” says Arissa Hall, project manager for the Brooklyn Community Bail Fund.In April 2017, a group of nonprofits launched a campaign they’re calling National Black Mama’s Bail Out Day to protest these punitive penalties. The goal: raise funds to help release as many moms…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Keep Calm and Marry OnTOAST WITH THE MOSTThe Pimm’s Cup, built around a gin-based liqueur blended with spices, has been a summertime staple in the UK for centuries and will add some fizz to the festivities. We asked bartender Chad Parkhill, author of Around the World in 80 co*cktails, to help us concoct the libation.1. Wash fruits for garnish (Parkhill likes blackberries, strawberries, and half wheels of orange and lemon).2. Create thin ribbons from 1 baby cucumber. Fill a Collins glass with ice, fruit, and a cucumber ribbon.3. Add 1 ounce Pimm’s No. 1 Cup, 1 ounce gin, and ½ ounce lemon juice. Top with 6 ounces lemon-lime soda (Sprite, 7 Up) or ginger ale, or a mix of both. Stir to combine and place a straw in the drink.4. Tuck 1 sprig of…3 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Upper CrustINSTAGRAM is a visual feast of rainbow-bright salads and towering ice cream cones. And Lauren Ko’s exactingly patterned pies and tarts (often studded with motifs like dragon fruit trapezoids and kiwi triangles) belong with the cream of the crop. But there’s another reason her treats are gaining followers (130,000 and counting): The 30-year-old Seattleite is completely self-taught. Until recently, Ko worked as an executive assistant for a college chancellor—but now she’s been catapulted into confectionary stardom.Her main ingredients: “I’m inspired by geometric patterns, architecture, and textiles. I’ve seen things done with pie that involve cookie cutters or cut flower shapes, but I want my designs to feel more experimental. It also helps that Seattle has great produce. What can you do with ten pounds of cherries other than stuff it…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018BEHIND THE VEILYOUR SKIN IS PRETTY and white,” my daughter tells me. “My skin is brown. Darker.” She frowns. “Dad’s is the darkest,” she adds. Her father is Indian. “You are you,” I tell her. “You are beautiful.” She is 5.I remind her of things that are brown and beautiful: chocolate, the earth! “Chocolate is bitter,” she says. “The earth is dirt.” I fill her bookshelves with beautiful brown characters, send her to a school with beautiful brown students and smart brown teachers. She remains unconvinced.One day she decides to grow out the blunt bob she requested last year. She can’t blonde her hair (not on my watch) or blue her eyes (yet) or white her skin (ever). But she can long her hair. This, she can control.Every day she brushes her…4 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Adam’s STYLE SHEETGARDEN PARTYA fit-and-flare silhouette flatters practically every body type, and the retro vibe is ultrafeminine.SUMMER CONCERTThis knit column maxi is supersoft and sexy. Fashion enthusiasts will appreciate the bold color blocking.FARMERS’ MARKETGo with the flow stylishly in this boho midi dress. The ample sleeves and loose fit ensure comfort and coverage.Night MovesTake your pinks from day to evening with this glamorizing trio: a strappy heel, an eye-catching clutch, and statement-making sparklers.Follow O creative director Adam Glassman on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat @TheRealAdamSays.RICHARD MAJCHRZAK/STUDIO D. SOFT GOODS STYLING: GABRIEL RIVERA/R.J. BENNETT REPRESENTS. GLASSMAN: SERGIO KURHAJEC.…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Cosmetics1. HIGHLIGHTERHOURGLASS VANISH FLASH HIGHLIGHTING STICKUse one of these five longwearing glow-getters to accent cheekbones, browbones—anywhere you want to draw attention. It’s the next-best thing to traveling with your own lighting crew. ($42 each; sephora.com)2. BRONZERL’ORÉAL PARIS TRUE MATCH LUMI BRONZE IT BRONZERWhether you want sculpted cheekbones or a luminous finish, this lustrous powder delivers. Bonus: The compact’s ample size (it makes your palm look small) means it will last you all spring and well into summer. ($15 each; Walmart)3. EYELINERMAYBELLINE NEW YORK LASTING DRAMA LIGHT EYE LINER PENCILOn crazy mornings, this shimmery liner is all you need to look polished. The waterproof cream pencil lasts all day and is available in five flattering metallic shades. ($6 each; drugstores)4. LIPSTICKFENTY BEAUTY MATTEMOISELLE PLUSH MATTE LIPSTICKGet the best of both worlds:…3 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018SPFHAWAIIAN TROPIC ANTIOXIDANT + SUNSCREEN LOTION WITH SPF 30The sun’s UV rays increase free radicals, so this blocker smartly includes antioxidant green tea extract to quash those nasties at the source. ($8; drugstores)SUPERGOOP! SMOOTH & PORELESS MATTE SCREEN SPF 40Create the perfect canvas for makeup with this featherlight, 100 percent mineral sunblock with a matte finish. ($38; Blue Mercury stores)AVEENO ULTRA-CALMING DAILY MOISTURIZER BROAD SPECTRUM SPF 30This moisturizer makes sunscreen a part of your morning routine (as it should be). Ideal for sensitive skin, it also calms redness with feverfew extract. ($14; target.com)BANANA BOAT SIMPLY PROTECT SPORT SUNSCREEN SPRAY SPF 50+Nothing is worse than sunscreen in your eyes, which is why this sweat- and water-resistant spray is ideal for outdoor activities. You can run, but your SPF won’t. ($8; drugstores)SHISEIDO…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Sky’s the LimitTHE CANCER PATIENT—call her Jane—weakly squeezed Lakisha Henderson’s hand. For a grueling month, Henderson had been Jane’s nurse at Cancer Treatment Centers of America’s (CTCA) Newnan, Georgia, facility, and her care team was discussing next steps. Jane desperately needed a crucial stem cell procedure and would have to fly to CTCA’s Philadelphia hospital to get it. “The only way I’m going,” she said, “is if Lakisha goes, too.”Henderson is famous around the hospital for going above and beyond. She’s visited families at home to console them after the death of a loved one; she sings gospel songs to comfort patients (“Be Ye Also Ready” is a popular request).However, she’d never gone so literally above, so far beyond as to board an airplane for a patient. As all her coworkers well…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Taking It to the StreetsJANEL PEREZ doesn’t do scrubs. Out on L.A.’s sidewalks, the nurse practitioner opts for discount-store jeans and New Balance sneakers to better blend in among the homeless veterans she tends. Her bag of tricks is a canvas backpack that’s like a portable clinic, with a blood pressure cuff, needles, stethoscope, thermometer, bandages, and syringes filled with vaccines for influenza and hep A.Last year there were more than 40,000 homeless veterans in the U.S., 29 percent of them living in California. In 2011, Perez helped launch a mobile medical team to scour L.A. for these vets and offer them healthcare and a place to live. That pilot program has evolved into a partnership between the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development and Veterans Affairs Supportive Housing that serves 6,000 veterans…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018A Port in the StormWHEN THE NURSES landed in San Juan, Puerto Rico, after Hurricane Maria hit last fall, they gasped at the destruction. And the rest of the island was in even worse shape: Violent winds had ripped roofs off houses, and mudslides had leveled neighborhoods. After days without fresh water, some people were drinking from contaminated creeks.“The level of chaos was staggering,” says Cathy Kennedy (standing, fourth from right), the leader of a team of 50 nurses from the nonprofit Registered Nurse Response Network who had come to provide emergency medicine. Kennedy was in charge of coordinating healthcare volunteers. From a command center in a San Juan sports arena, she sent nurses to buy bottles of water and haul them via school bus to decimated barrios. She organized teams to distribute tubes…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Gear ShiftMORE THAN MEETS THE EYEThese shades measure your brain wave activity as you complete mindfulness training via an app, which then uses your data to suggest strategies for staying focused. (Smith Lowdown Focus glasses, $349; smithoptics.com)BUG OFFEssential oils like geranium and peppermint give this organic insect repellent a nonchemical scent you’ll love. ($20; zoeorganics.com)SMARTY PANTSA fun floral print and ultralightweight fabric that blocks the sun and doesn’t show sweat? You’ll want a pair for every day of the week. (Sonic Spin Tight, $79; athleta.com)ALL ON THE WRISTThis colorful bracelet bears the internationally recognized medical symbol; the inside is engraved with your health info—think food allergies or a heart condition—so you’ll stay safe on your travels. (Key West medical ID cuff, from $45; laurenshope.com)ROCK BOTTOMThe creators say the gems in this…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018SIREN SONGIN MADELINE MILLER’S spellbinding second novel, Circe (Lee Boudreaux Books), the golden goddess of the title knows that history will remember her unkindly: “Humbling women seems to me a chief pastime of poets. As if there can be no story unless we crawl and weep.” Readers familiar with The Odyssey may recall Circe only as the beguiling witch Odysseus beds while making his way back to his faithful wife, Penelope—little more than a cautionary tale for men about feminine treachery. But in Miller’s conception, Circe is the hero of her own epic.Though she’s the daughter of the mighty sun god Helios, Circe has never been at home amid the Titans who rule cruelly over the mortal world. Even as a young girl, and despite being gifted with potions and spells—among…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Black and BlueNAFISSA THOMPSON-SPIRES pulls no punches in her boundary-pushing short-story collection, Heads of the Colored People (37 Ink/Atria). Take “Suicide, Watch,” a satirical tale about a social media maven who decides to end it all—then abruptly changes her mind. It opens: “Jilly took her head out of the oven mainly because it was hot and the gas did not work independently of the pilot light.” With gallows humor and brazen originality, the author plunges us deep into the interiorities of quirkily indelible characters, mostly black women, keeping us focused on the chaos beneath surface-level stability.Thompson-Spires has a gift for rendering difficult topics—race and gender, to name two—with delicacy, timeliness, and even whimsy. In “Whisper to a Scream,” Raina is subjected to racial epithets and fetish jokes as she makes online relaxation…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018WHAT CAN WE AGREE ON?NO MATTER OUR INDIVIDUAL politics, every citizen can surely agree that America’s pretty far from domestic tranquility these days. The talking heads are braying. The online commentariat is spewing hatred IN CAPS LOCK. We’re wondering whether we should bring riot gear to the next family dinner—if we’re still having family dinners, that is. In one 2016 survey, around half the Democrats and half the Republicans reported that the opposing party made them feel angry, frustrated, even afraid.But despite the vitriol, we residents of the United States still have one area of common ground: the piece of land we call home, where we have to figure out how to coexist. As Abraham Lincoln said to a divided nation in his 1861 inaugural address, “We must not be enemies. Though passion may…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018TALKING POINTS“Though I cohost a talk show, sometimes I go silent. The words silent and listen have the same letters. When we listen, we give each other room to see each other as we are. And when we’re making change together, we have to let some things go. I have hope whenever I hear someone say, ‘I’m tired of fighting. I just want to find the answer.’”—HARRIS FAULKNER, host of Fox News Channel’s Outnumbered Overtime and cohost of Outnumbered“When you’re married to someone from the world of politics, you socialize with opinionated people. Luckily, my mother, who was Nancy Reagan’s social secretary, taught me diplomacy. Anytime somebody’s making my blood boil, I wonder what they looked like as an infant. All babies are cute. Then I smile.”—ALI WENTWORTH, actress, author of…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018INWARD SPIRALLast year two-thirds of U.S. adults reported getting at least some news from social media, with Facebook in the lead. But that open forum can become an echo chamber, limiting our perspective and reinforcing our worst ideas about the other side.1. YOU BLOCK CRAZY COUSIN KYLE… after reading his latest news nugget—that there are ISIS sleeper cells in Planned Parenthood clinics. And boy, does it feel good. So good, in fact, that you also block cousin Sue, her kids, and your Republican neighbor (later he’ll post a thought-provoking op-ed about the refugee crisis, but unfortunately, you’ll miss it). Close to 30 percent of social media users say they’ve blocked or unfriended someone who’s posted political content. Now, even though your network may include diverse connections, your feed—and your world—just got…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018TALKING POINTS“Even if I find an opinion downright abhorrent, I keep asking more questions to gain better insight into that person’s perspective. It’s like conducting a scientific inquiry. The key is to stay respectful—and a sense of humor always helps.”—ALEX WAGNER, author of Futureface and CBS News contributor“As a hostage negotiator, I could listen empathetically to anyone—even terrorists—once I realized that understanding and articulating someone’s viewpoint is not the same as agreeing with it. Decoupling those ideas is a powerful and liberating concept.”—CHRIS VOSS, former FBI lead international kidnapping negotiator and author of Never Split the Difference…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018KUMBAYA—NOTI USED TO PRIDE myself on living by Atticus Finch’s dictum in To Kill a Mockingbird: “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view…until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.”Oh, Atticus, how I’ve failed you. I’ve cut off my beloved uncle, now a Fox News addict. (No surprise—he still says women ought to stay barefoot and pregnant.) I hung up on a friend who claimed Donald Trump was joking (ha) when he said, “There are fine people on both sides.” And I unfriended a charming Facebook acquaintance who usually shares grandkid pics after she posted an image of Trump (looking more photoshopped than a Kardashian) captioned “My President!” On my news feed. Buh-bye, Grandma!However, I still cling to Margaret,…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THE RULES OF ENGAGEMENTPARAPHRASE what the other person has just said to make sure you understand and that she feels heard. Don’t go further by suggesting implications of her view:“So you’re saying you wish Trump wouldn’t tweet so much, but he’s there to shake things up in Washington.”NOT…“SO YOU’RE SAYING THE CHARACTER OF THE PRESIDENT DOESN’T MATTER.”ASK QUESTIONS to clarify, not to provoke:“How did you come to believe that moving toward single-payer healthcare is best?”NOT…“HOW CAN YOU DEFEND SOMETHING AS MESSED UP AS OBAMACARE?”USE “I” STATEMENTS (“This is how I see it”) more often than truth statements (“This is how it is”):“I’m afraid we’re going off a cliff on climate change, and there will be no coming back.”NOT…“WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO EVACUATE COASTAL CITIES BEFORE THIS CENTURY IS OVER.”DON’T TAKE THE BAIT…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 201818 THINGS WE CAN TOTALLY AGREE ONBABIES IN GLASSES: THE CUTESTNO ONE WANTS TO READ BEOWULFROSE ABSOLUTELY HAD ROOM FOR JACK ON THAT FLOATING DOORFINDING $20 IN YOUR COAT POCKET NEVER GETS OLDEGGS ARE A FREAKIN’ MIRACLETHERE OUGHT TO BE A WHITE WINE EMOJIPENICILLIN ROCKSASTRONAUTS DO, TOOPIZZA!YOUTH IS WASTED ON THE YOUNGEVERYTHING’S UNNIER-FAY IN IG-PAY ATIN-LAYMAMMOGRAMS—THERE’S GOT TO BE A BETTER WAYNUTELLA SHOULD BE A SUPERFOODHYENAS ARE JERKSYOU CAN’T HEAR “FLIGHT OF THE VALKYRIES” WITHOUT SILENTLY SINGING KILL THE WABBIT, KILL THE WABBIT…THE HEALING POWER OF INTERSPECIES FRIENDSHIPSSOMETIMES YOU REALLY DO FEEL LIKE A NUT……AND SOMETIMES YOU DON’T…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THE MAN IN THE PICTUREYOU’VE SEEN THE PHOTO: April 4, 1968, the exterior of Memphis’s Lorraine Motel. A mortally wounded Martin Luther King Jr. lies on a second-floor balcony as blood pools around him on the gray concrete. The toes of his polished dress shoes stick out past the edge of the railing, over the cars in the lot below. Standing above him, three people frantically point to a rooming house across the street. A fourth person’s gaze is fixed on the same spot, but with his right hand, he holds a white towel to King’s shattered jaw. It’s this man I found myself unable to look away from when I first saw the photo at the age of 4, maybe 5. He seems to be in shock, but alert, tensed, ready to leap…12 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018SINGULAR SensationWhy We Love ItAvocado toast is a social media sensation for a very tasty reason, but smashing and spreading isn’t the only way to enjoy this buttery fruit in the morning. Pile a few slices on your breakfast sandwich for a satisfying cheese alternative, throw it in your blender for an extra-creamy smoothie, or get creative, as we did here, by adding chunks to breakfast chilaquiles or cooking an egg within the velvety flesh. Whatever your method, your a.m. meal will be all you avo wanted and more.To freeze for smoothies, mash avocados with lemon or lime juice (to curb browning) and place in an airtight container.For maximum flavor, let avocados ripen at room temperature (they’re ready when they yield to a light squeeze) before storing in the fridge, where…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018SPREAD THE LOVEI’M ALWAYS COMING up with new versions of the charcuterie-packed muffuletta sandwich because it’s a guaranteed hit, especially at a picnic or the beach. You can make it in advance—the longer it sits, the better it gets—and it’s so full of meat, cheese, and greens that you don’t need to serve anything else. When I was a kid, my mom used to pack it for me for lunch at school. It was the Italian version of a bologna sandwich, and I definitely got some curious looks from my classmates, but I was too satisfied with its tender goodness to care. My special ingredient? Basil-almond pesto. I love the bright and herby sauce so much that I usually make a double batch and serve it over chicken or pork, or toss…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018RAY OF LIGHTJamie Foxx turned us on to these fab frames.Get sleek strands like Oprah’s with this combo.AT THIS MONTH’S cover shoot, Oprah was feeling serene in a palette-cleansing, spirit-lifting white ensemble. Bopping along to Taylor Swift’s “End Game,” our model, a huge fan of neutrals, was thrilled to discover she could wear pants in the heavenly shade without the usual earthly concerns. “It’s hard not to look like a balloon in white pants, but these have a really nice cut,” she said. “They’re fantastic—like pajamas, but with a crease. Thank you so much, Michael Kors!”WHITE-HOTWake up your wardrobe with a little—or a lot of—white. Finish off a head-to-toe ivory outfit with a modern sneaker, or add smart white accents, like a tote, earrings, or a watch, to jeans and a tee.…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Here We Go!PUPPIES ARE ADORABLE. There’s nothing like a warm bath. A cup of tea tastes better when you’re wearing slippers. (And tastes best after a warm bath and a few hours of cuddling puppies.) At the risk of being presumptuous, I believe these are statements we can all get behind.But there are, of course, subjects on which many of us differ, and I mean differ. Our country is more deeply divided than most of us can remember ever seeing. It hurts to witness the toll this division is taking on our nation—and it’s even more painful when it separates us from our loved ones. Which is why I hope you’ll head to page 118, where we’re aiming to help everyone find some common ground.More things we can agree on: Come May…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018UNDER HER SPELLO: You’ve performed on London stages for two decades. How did you wind up in Harry Potter land?NOMA DUMEZWENI: In 2015, I was asked to participate in a workshop to help improve a play, but the play itself was kept secret. On the first day, we learned what it was—and I thought, There’s a stage version of Harry Potter? Why? But when I saw what had been created, I fell in love. And when I was cast as Hermione, my response was, “Shut the f--- up, are you serious?” I got to join the most benign cult in the world!O: There was a lot of online noise when your role was announced for the original production in London. Some people referred to you as the “black Hermione.”ND: I find that…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THE ROYAL TREATMENTIn our December 2017 issue, O reader and royal-family fanatic Casey Kitchens told us about the most moving gift she’d ever received, courtesy of her husband, Matt: a night alone in a hotel so the mom of three could watch Prince William and Kate Middleton’s wedding in peace. What does Kitchens, who lives in Crystal Springs, Mississippi, have cooking for this month’s showstopping nuptials? We checked in:“My 8-year-old son has no interest in anything wedding related, but my daughters, 11 and 7, are now old enough to watch with me, so I want to make new memories with them. My goal is to get us a room at the same hotel I stayed in last time. It’s called the King Edward, which sounds pretty regal to me. We’ll bring homemade…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Aidy BryantBEST EMOJII know people like the rabbits and dogs and hearts, but I really love that drumstick. It offers a little unexpected pizzazz.BEST COLLECTIONCrystals. Two years ago, I found a store in New York City called Rock Star Crystals and felt like I’d truly lost my mind. By the time I left, I thought, I just spent $200 on rocks. What am I doing? I don’t know what mine are for—I choose them based on colors I like.BEST DATEMy boyfriend once took me to a train-themed restaurant called the Choo-Choo in a suburb of Chicago. They serve your hamburger and fries on a model train that zooms across the counter. It’s likely meant for kids, but I was delighted.BEST WARDROBE STAPLENever underestimate the power of a good bra. Boobs are…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Holding PATTERNAS AN AIRLINE ticket agent, Aminah Akram spends her workdays accommodating people who aren’t exactly at their best. “I have a thick skin!” says the 48-year-old, who lives in Lilburn, Georgia. In her off-hours, she cares for her 10-year-old daughter, who’s being evaluated for autism (“Her teachers love her, but she has social challenges with her peers”), and her 22-year-old son, who’s in college. She also often ferries around her mother, who lives with her and doesn’t drive, and her sister, who doesn’t have a car.All the demands on Aminah’s time have left her depleted, depressed, and longing for a romantic partner’s love and support—something she hasn’t had since 2007. “I’m in the dating rut of my life,” she says. “I’ve gone out with guys occasionally, but it’s rare that…7 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018HairSTYLING SAVIORSAnyone will benefit from adding these items to their routine—they’re what good hair days are made of.T3 CURA LUXE HAIR DRYERThis model is going to blow you away: It has five heat and two speed settings plus a cool-shot switch to make the results as customizable as your morning latte. ($250; amazon.com)BUMBLE AND BUMBLE COLOR GLOSS IN CLEARSalon colorists usually recommend a transparent gloss to give hair shine. Now you can do the deed at home with a product that hydrates for softness in addition to delivering a mirrorlike finish. ($34; bumbleandbumble.com)TRESEMMÉ COMPRESSED MICROMIST LEVEL 3 HAIR SPRAYIf you equate hairspray with shellacked helmets of hair, you’re in for a surprise. This superfine mist easily disperses to give you complete distribution, while the fast-drying, flexible formula will hold off…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Hall O FameMARY KAY TIMEWISE MATTE-WEAR AND LUMINOUS-WEAR LIQUID FOUNDATIONSWith antioxidants and peptides, this is really antiaging skincare masquerading as foundation. Both the matte and radiant finishes are available in 23 shades. ($22 each; marykay.com)PANTENE PRO-V MOISTURE RENEWAL 3 MINUTE MIRACLE DAILY CONDITIONERIn a matter of seconds, dry hair springs back to life—healthy, bouncy, and supremely touchable. A miracle indeed. ($6; drugstores)JERGENS NATURAL GLOW INSTANT SUN SUNLESS TANNING MOUSSENatural Glow pioneered the idea of the gradual self-tan. But they can do instant gratification, too, with this ultraquick-drying (think 60 seconds), never-orange self-tanning foam. ($13; drugstores)MAYBELLINE NEW YORK INSTANT AGE REWIND ERASER TREATMENT MAKEUPUse the microfiber-tipped applicator to buff away fine lines in a flash. Goji berry extracts and collagen help firm skin over time. ($13; drugstores)BURT’S BEES RENEWAL REFINING CLEANSERGet supple skin…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Being ThereRED RIVER WOMEN’S CLINIC is North Dakota’s only abortion facility. Every Wednesday—the day the procedure is performed—a dozen or so demonstrators are already huddled around the building when it opens; by early afternoon, up to 100 people might be brandishing signs: PRAY TO END ABORTION. ADOPTION: THE GIFT OF LIFE AND LOVE. WOMEN DO REGRET ABORTION.By the time a patient makes it past the protesters, she’s already endured what’s likely been a long drive (North Dakota covers more than 69,000 square miles); a state-required counseling session telling her that abortion will “terminate the life of a whole, separate, unique, living human being”; and a mandatory 24-hour waiting period before going ahead with the procedure. But there’s an antidote to her mounting anxiety: kind, steadfast Sarah Haeder, a nurse whose gentle…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Safe PassageTHE CALL SEEMED ROUTINE: Pick up a toddler with an enlarged heart and bring her back to the pediatric ICU at WVU Medicine Children’s Hospital in Morgantown, West Virginia. Kevin Steurer’s team jumped into an ambulance and sped two hours into the Appalachian Mountains. When they arrived at the ER of the little girl’s local medical center, Steurer, a pediatric transport nurse, took one look at her ashen skin, half-closed eyes, and labored breathing and knew she might not survive the return drive. He grabbed the phone and called the specialist waiting for them. “We’ll lose her if we don’t intubate,” he said, “but I’m worried even that will be more than she can take.”With the clock ticking, Steurer gave the child a diuretic to reduce the stress on her…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018The Pain RelieverIT’S TERRIFYING ENOUGH to give birth when you’re surrounded by supportive family. But imagine that you’re 17—or 14—and pregnancy has brought you nothing but trouble and shame. And your mom is still so angry with you that when you’re in the delivery room and it’s time for the epidural that would ease your agony, she says no—to punish you. And there’s nothing you can do about it because by law you need the consent of a parent or guardian for your own healthcare.This scene replayed over and over during the two years Maureen Sweeney worked as a labor and delivery nurse at MetroHealth Medical Center in Cleveland. It devastated Sweeney, who had her own first child at 18, to think that girls who were about to become mothers couldn’t request…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Mind Over MANIIF YOU HAVE TIME to get a manicure, you have time to meditate. That’s the philosophy behind the hand treatments at the buzzy New York City salon Sundays, where you can be pampered with nontoxic products while listening to a guided meditation via plush headphones. Here’s how to experience a more mindful manicure, wherever you are.Set the mood.For DIY manicures, play music, make tea, and light a candle (like Chesapeake Bay’s Peace + Tranquility three-wick candle, $15; target.com). “You want an immersive experience without distractions,” says Dawes, founder of the NYC mindfulness center Kindred. Whether you’re at home or the salon, silence and stash your phone.Breathe it out.To let go of tension, when you sit down take a deep breath through your nose. As you exhale, let your shoulders melt…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THIRSTYIN The Recovering: Intoxication and Its Aftermath (Little Brown), Leslie Jamison’s immersion into the consuming murk of addiction and the sparkling sea of its literature—the novels of Jean Rhys, with their abject heroines haunted by lost children and lovers; the short fiction of Raymond Carver (“painful and precise, like carefully bitten fingernails”)—the author asks “if stories about getting better could ever be as compelling as stories about falling apart.”It’s no mean feat, morphing the alcoholic’s plodding modus operandi (“More. Again. Forever.” as Jamison puts it) into sentences that surprise and shimmer, but she achieves it here frequently: “Booze helped you see, and then it helped you survive the sight,” she writes of her youthful devotion to this sodden mythology. “I idolized the iconic drunk writers because I understood their drinking…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Dirty Little Secrets“Gender Studies,” the opening salvo of Curtis Sittenfeld’s mischievous story collection, You Think It, I’ll Say It, centers on a jilted professor of women’s history who hooks up with her Trump-supporting airport shuttle driver. You’re a moron, she thinks before picturing him performing oral sex on her. She, like many in these stories, has a hilariously warped sense of herself and the world around her. But what’s bad for them and those in their orbit—like the hapless husband in “A Regular Couple,” whose new bride holds so strong a grudge against a former classmate, it threatens to ruin their honeymoon—is cathartic fun for us. In “The Prairie Wife,” a lesbian mom staves off domestic boredom by cyberstalking her ex-girlfriend, a celebrity whose conservative (read: heterosexual) lifestyle is a cornerstone of…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THE PEACE PROCESSI ALWAYS TREATED them lightly in my New York Times column, those unnerving episodes with my conservative family. I wrote about my mom grimacing that I was a “fem-lib”; my sister, Peggy, throwing me out of her guest room; my brother Michael complaining that I was so hard on President George W. Bush that if a hurricane hit, I’d blame it on him. (And then one did, and I did.)In real life, those moments got harder and harder. Michael and I had always been close. He was 17 years older and had helped raise me, passing down his love of old movies and classical music. But as he grew more irritated by my columns criticizing W. about the Iraq War, the intimacy between us eroded.Then, in 2007, Michael died of…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018STUCK IN THE MIDDLE WITH YOUThough Margaret Hoover and John Avlon have been married for eight years, the sparks are still flying: She’s a GOP stalwart (and great-granddaughter of Herbert Hoover) and the author of American Individualism: How a New Generation of Conservatives Can Save the Republican Party. He’s a centrist who believes hyperpartisanship is damaging the country (to wit, his book Wingnuts: Extremism in the Age of Obama). The pair have had their share of squabbles, but at the end of the day, they always manage to remember that they’re on the same side.SHE SAYS: “In the Hoover house, Democrat was a bad word. When something broke, my mom would say ‘It went Democrat on us.’ So at first, whenever John said anything that wasn’t pro–Republican Party, I took it as an attack on…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018UNCOMMON KNOWLEDGEOnly 54 percent of Americans know that people born in Puerto Rico are U.S. citizens.OBAMACARE IS THE SAME THING AS THE AFFORDABLE CARE ACT! THAT’S NEWS TO 33 PERCENT OF US.53 percent of us believe people who are in the U.S. illegally have no protections under the Constitution.37 percent can’t name even one right guaranteed by the First Amendment.64 PERCENT OF US CAN’T FIND NORTH KOREA ON A MAP.Only 60 percent can identify the country that voted to leave the European Union.(IT’S THE UNITED KINGDOM.)SOURCES: MORNING CONSULT POLL, SEPTEMBER 2017 (PUERTO RICO); MORNING CONSULT POLL, JANUARY 2017 (AFFORDABLE CARE ACT); 2017 ANNENBERG CONSTITUTION CIVICS SURVEY; NEW YORK TIMES, PUBLISHED JULY 5, 2017 (NORTH KOREA); PEW RESEARCH CENTER JULY 2017 (EUROPEAN UNION).…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018STRANGER IN A STRANGE LANDWHEN PEOPLE in my liberal northern Virginia community find out I’m conservative, they’re often shocked. I feel like a citizen of some newly discovered country: “Explain to me your customs—what is this world you come from?” It’s like I have a duck on my head. I want to say, “You know Republicans aren’t aliens, right? We do exist. There are plenty of us in the Capitol Building, right up the highway.”The morning after the 2016 elections, when I walked my kids to school, let’s just say I didn’t see high-fiving in the streets. There was vodka in the coffee mugs. The principal gathered the teachers to make sure everyone was okay. People were posting on Facebook that they were crying in their children’s arms. There was a three-day hangover afterward.I…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018WHO KNEW?I ONCE DID A WORKSHOP on negotiation with a group of lawyers in Philadelphia who were a very rational, straitlaced bunch. We were discussing the role of emotion in negotiation—using it to connect with others—and they seemed not to entirely get it. Emotion was outside the terrain of what they were accustomed to talking about at work. So I said: “Find a stranger in this room, pair up with that person, and in the next two minutes, try to identify as many connections between you as possible. The stranger, the wilder, the weirder, the better.” And so they did. All of a sudden they were invigorated. “You like sailing?” one person said. “I like sailing!” It was as if each of them had found a long-lost friend. One pair discovered…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018TALKING POINTS“When I was confronted on C-SPAN by ‘Garry from North Carolina,’ an admitted racist, I thought about the roots of his fear: If the only people of color I knew were accused criminals on the news, I’d be scared, too. I thanked him for his honesty. Once we got to know each other, he told me he was reading Cornel West and ‘practicing not being prejudiced.’ What we share is our desire to be better citizens.”—HEATHER McGHEE, president of the public policy organization Demos“For people who say they can’t stand listening to the other side, I suggest a game: Flip the script and imagine the sound bite or action you hate is coming from a politician you support. We’re so reluctant to give people the benefit of the doubt, but…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018WHERE ARE YOU GOING?MICHELLE OAKLEY All-species vetInto the Great Wide OpenDon’t worry, I’m not hunting these bison—I’m helping make sure they survive. As a wildlife vet based in the Yukon, I’m part of a conservation project monitoring the health and number of bison herds; we dart them with sedatives, then do exams and take blood samples. Unfortunately, they won’t trot up to you and say, “Go ahead and look in my mouth!”I grew up on a creek in suburban Indiana, where I used to bait and catch injured squirrels and raccoons and clean their wounds. When I was 8 or 9 years old, you could find me tending to an orphaned duckling the neighbors brought over. I spent so much time watching Jane Goodall and Dian Fossey in National Geographic specials—these women who…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWNAS I PULL APART a crisp yet densely pillowy samosa and heap it with spoonfuls of tangy tamarind chutney, I’m silently giving thanks to whatever forces conspired to land me here, in a living room in Queens, New York. Five strangers and I are sitting around the foldout wood dining table of a woman we met 15 minutes ago, when she padded to her front door in house slippers and hugged us hard. No, this isn’t the world’s weirdest Tinder date. It’s a cooking class unlike any you may have clutched a spatula at: New York City’s League of Kitchens (LOK) offers workshops led by female immigrants in their homes. Its stable of ten cooks, each from a different nation (Afghanistan, Argentina, Bangladesh, Greece, India, Japan, Lebanon, Mexico, Nepal, and…12 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Fast or FancyThe FancyA combo of sweet and white potatoes instantly ups your fry flavor game. And when you pile on gooey cheese and lush gravy (à la Quebec’s pièce de résistance, poutine), you’ve got some special spuds.Preheat oven to 450°. Peel 1 large russet potato and 1 large sweet potato and cut into fries. Soak in a large bowl of water for 20 minutes. Meanwhile, soak ½ ounce dried mushrooms per package instructions, rinse, and drain. Drain potatoes and spread on a paper towel–lined large baking sheet; pat until fully dry. Place in a large bowl and toss with 1 Tbsp. olive oil. Over dried baking sheet, spread 2 Tbsp. olive oil to coat. Add fries in a single layer and season with kosher salt and ground black pepper. Cover pan…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Shop Guide(All prices are approximate.)COVER On Oprah: Sweater, Derek Lam 10 Crosby, $595; saks.com. Pants, Michael Kors Collection, $1,195; michaelkors.com. Earrings, $1,295; ippolita.com. Bracelets and rings, Tiffany & Co., from $2,950; tiffany.com. Sneakers, Vionic, $90; vionicshoes.com.NO PURCHASE NECESSARY TO ENTER OR WIN. O, The Oprah Magazine’s Spring 2018 Beauty O-Wards Sweepstakes. Sponsored by Hearst Communications, Inc. Beginning April 17, 2018, at 12:01 a.m. (ET) through May 14, 2018, at 11:59 p.m. (ET), go to oprah.com/springbeautyowards on a computer or wireless device and complete and submit the entry form pursuant to the on-screen instructions. Five (5) Winners will each receive a prize package consisting of a collection of makeup from the Oprah Spring Beauty O-Wards 2018 as described in the May 2018 issue of O, The Oprah Magazine (ARV: $2,339) and a…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018What have you and a loved one agreed to disagree on?THIS MONTH WE WONDERED…Eating meat. For the past decade, I’ve been a vegetarian, but most of my friends are omnivores. When they tease me about being “holier than thou,” I say “There’s a quota of how much meat each person can eat—and having grown up in the South, I’ve already eaten mine.”REBECCA HILL Los AngelesReligion. My husband is an atheist. I am a person of strong Christian faith. We follow our own paths without denigrating each other’s beliefs.BARB PRESCOTT Northbridge, MassachusettsHow to load the dishwasher. My husband insists that you don’t need to rinse the dishes first, but I know you should clean off the food scraps!ELIZABETH VIRATA-SANTOS North Vancouver, British ColumbiaPARENTING TECHNIQUES. I’M MORE LAID-BACK, BUT MY FIANCÉ IS STRICT. WE’VE COMBINED OUR APPROACHES AND WORKED OUT AN ISSUE…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018The Gratitude MeterFive things we’re smiling about this month!SCHOOL OF LIFEGraduating? Yay! Adulting? Ack! Support the new diploma earner in your life with a set of satin ribbons that honor small victories. Because sometimes just putting on pants deserves a celebration. (theheirloomtomatos.etsy.com)STAY WOKENo matter where you are, don’t settle for subpar coffee. The Dripkit is a collapsible pour-over device, with tasty java already tucked inside a filter. Just add hot water and you’ve got a pick-me-up without having to BYOFP (bring your own French press). (dripkit.coffee)BLOWN AWAYBetween May 10 and 12, 15 high school jazz bands from around the nation will land in the Big Apple to play their hearts out in Jazz at Lincoln Center’s Essentially Ellington competition. You can tune in to the event’s livestream at jazz.org/watchee and see which…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Barks and RecreationBring H2O on the go.If you’re planning an all-day excursion, pack plenty of clean water. “You don’t want your pet drinking from oceans, rivers, or lakes,” says Michael J. Topper, PhD, DVM, president of the American Veterinary Medical Association. Why? They might contain organisms—algae, dead fish—that could cause illness. Try the AutoDogMug (1), a handy hybrid water bottle/bowl.Strap on some safety.Meet the Cadillac of dog life jackets: The Ruffwear Float Coat (2) comes in bright colors with reflective trim, features an adjustable neck closure (to help smaller pups keep their snout above water), and is topped off with a strong handle that lets owners easily hoist pooches from the surf when they’re pooped. And for sensitive eyes, there’s Doggles ILS (3): rubber-framed, shatterproof specs that protect against sand, sun, and…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Apple IDIN THE 1890s, a farmer named Robert E. Burns planted an estimated 160 varieties of apple trees in southeast Washington state. Unfortunately for him, his business failed—but the trees themselves did just fine. In fact, many of them still flourish. The problem: piecing together, more than a century later, what they are. That’s where apple detective David Benscoter comes in.Benscoter, 63, spent 24 years as an investigator for the FBI and U.S. Treasury, working on corruption and tax fraud cases. His first foray into apple recovery came about ten years ago, when, in the process of helping a neighbor pluck and later identify apples from trees on her property, he came across a book cataloging varieties thought to have nearly vanished. When Benscoter learned of nationwide efforts to track these…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THE WORLD ACCORDING TO GayleEATNot many steakhouses are owned by women, let alone mother-daughter teams. So I’m happy to introduce you to Babette Haddad (mom) and Melissa Haddad Malaga (daughter), the duo behind Maxwell’s Chophouse in New York City. I brought Team Gayle there recently, and we ordered burgers, steaks, crispy onion rings, and—the day’s big hit—a can of bacon strips that you grab and eat like French fries. Consider Maxwell’s Chophouse kid tested and mother approved.PLAYRecently, my favorite children (and millennials), Will and Kirby, told me about the new game they’re loving called HQ. Available on the App Store, the daily live trivia show is played by millions of folks around the country and hosted by quick-thinking comedian Scott Rogowsky. Contestants have ten seconds to answer a multiple-choice question. Guess right and you…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018The O ListTHANKS, MOM!A few things we think are just great for Mother’s Day.How Dry I AmThese little wonders marry classic espadrille form with high-tech neoprene and rubber function. So if you love piña coladas and getting caught in the rain, not to worry—they’ll dry in about 15 minutes. (Beachcomber espadrille water shoes, originally $68 to $89 per pair, now 20 percent off with code oprah; seastarbeachwear.com)Looping Her InAdd a touch of distinction to Mom’s everyday bag with a very swank robin’s-egg blue leather charm from you-know-where. (Bag charms, $150 each; tiffany.com)Calling All Pulse PointsEverything’s coming up peonies and pink peppercorns with a hint of sandalwood, thanks to this springy new scent from Sarah Jessica Parker. (Stash Unspoken by SJP, originally $65 for 1.7 ounces, now 20 percent off with code oprah;…3 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018FaceSWEEPSTAKES!Five lucky readers will win beauty booty from the Spring 2018 Beauty O-wards worth more than $2,000. GO TO OPRAH.COM/SPRINGBEAUTYOWARDS TO ENTER. HERE’S TO A GORGEOUS YOU! FOR RULES SEE SHOP GUIDE.ANTIAGING FOR ALLThe greatest ways to diminish lines, banish bags, and bid farewell to brown spots, no matter your skin tone or type.STRIVECTIN WRINKLE RECODE LINE TRANSFORMING MELTING SERUMAn exclusive form of vitamin B3 and oils, such as macadamia, work to help make even the deepest grooves a thing of the past. ($89; strivectin.com)PERRICONE MD COLD PLASMA+ EYEWhat do copper tripeptides, vitamin C ester, and omega-3s have in common? Together they dramatically diminish bags and dark circles and firm the eye area to visibly improve the appearance of crow’s-feet. ($110; perriconemd.com)VICHY LIFTACTIV VITAMIN C BRIGHTENING SKIN CORRECTORLess is more…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018BodyEUCERIN ECZEMA RELIEF HAND CREMEEven those who don’t suffer from the skin condition will benefit from a recipe that uses licorice root, colloidal oatmeal, and ceramides to tamp down redness, itchiness, and irritation. ($7; drugstores)LA ROCHE-POSAY LIPIKAR LOTION DAILY REPAIRThis shea butter–enriched formula, which got the thumbs-up from the National Eczema Association, is a champion reliever of flakes and dryness. ($18; drugstores)DOVE EXFOLIATING BODY POLISHAvailable in three delicious varieties, this luscious scrub takes care of scaly skin with silica and replenishes with the brand’s legendary moisturizing cream. ($6; drugstores)REN AHA SMART RENEWAL BODY SERUMThe gorgeous results you get from using alpha hydroxy acids on your face can also happen from the neck down. Smoother arms, legs, and feet can be yours, too. ($42; sephora.com)CHANEL CHANCE BODY OIL SPRAYLock in moisture…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018The Right TrackEVERY MAY, THOUSANDS of spectators swan through the stands at the Kentucky Derby, wearing floppy hats and drinking mint juleps. Meanwhile, in the barn area, sweat trickling from under their baseball caps, the “backside workers” muck the stables and walk, bathe, and rub down the horses. These mostly Latino laborers, who typically arrive in Louisville on temporary work visas, are up at 4 a.m. six days a week to keep the $4 billion Kentucky racing economy galloping along.The laborers, most of whom lack health insurance and can ill afford to miss a day’s pay, have been known to work through crippling pneumonia. Marina, a 35-year-old horse walker from Guatemala, once spent weeks ignoring nearblinding headaches. Then she stumbled upon a health fair at which free blood-sugar screenings were being offered…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Reading the SignsTHE BOY ARRIVED for his first full day of kindergarten with gray skin, dark circles under his eyes, and aching legs. The school nurse called his mother, who assumed growing pains and a cold. Nurse Patti wasn’t having it: “Those symptoms screamed blood disorder.” She convinced his mother to take him to a pediatrician and then a hospital, where he was diagnosed with leukemia. Happy ending: The now 7-year-old is in remission.Then there was the sixth grader who hit her head at recess. No obvious injuries, but Nurse Patti saw bleeding deep in her ear, a sign of a fractured skull. She called an ambulance but couldn’t reach the parents, so she sprinted three blocks to their home. Another full recovery.Also: the student who started fainting in class. Nurse Patti…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Walking the WalkMONDAY, YOU’RE fine. Tuesday, you find a lump. Wednesday, you leave an oncologist’s office thinking you’re dying—or will be if you don’t subject yourself to the ravages of chemo or surgery. And all the while you can’t quite believe it’s real. “Many breast cancer patients are like, ‘But I don’t feel sick!’” says Pamela McTague, a clinical research nurse at City of Hope in Duarte, California.McTague meets patients after their diagnosis, when they’re reeling. She shepherds them through clinical trials, explaining the process and procedures, like radioactive-isotope injections, and monitoring their prognosis. Beyond the hours they’re together at the hospital, she maintains an ongoing relationship with her charges, checking in at three months, six months, a year, even five years.But what really makes McTague a godsend to her patients is…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Happy WheelsRegular riders won’t be surprised to learn that biking to work benefits your physical health (2017 research from the University of Glasgow linked cycling with a 41 percent lower risk of premature death compared with nonactive commuting). But saddling up every morning could also boost your mental wellbeing, says Meik Wiking, author of The Little Book of Lykke: Secrets of the World’s Happiest People and CEO of the Happiness Research Institute in Copenhagen. Denmark is consistently ranked as one of the top three most content countries on the planet in the UN’s World Happiness Report, and its bike-centric culture may help explain why. “In a 2014 study, cyclists and walkers reported higher lykke [pronounced LOO-kah]—the Danish word for happiness—than people who commuted to work by car or public transportation,” says…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018Safe + SoundListen up, outdoor exercisers! If you need music for your mojo, you need headphones that let you hear potential hazards. We tested the latest models and were impressed by EarHero’s tiny speakers ($149; earhero.com); because they don’t block your ear canal, you can hear low-level sounds from yards away. We could barely feel them, and they stayed put even on windy jogs. Wireless fans will love Trekz Titanium by AfterShokz (below, $130; aftershokz.com). The wraparound frame rests in front of your ears, transferring tunes via your cheekbones, and held up on a sweaty run. One tester could clearly hear her music (and phone convos) while staying aware of cars and cyclists. Her verdict: “You won’t miss a beat—or a beep!”…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018DARKNESS VISIBLEAN ANGRY TEENAGER guns down dozens of his classmates, politicians offer platitudes, and nothing changes. You’ve heard this story before—from fiction writers as varied as Walter Dean Myers and Jodi Picoult and, most vividly, on the evening news, in a country that sees an average of nearly one mass shooting a day. But in joining this tragic canon, Tom McAllister’s haunting second novel, How to Be Safe (Liveright), centers not on the event that sets the larger crisis in motion, but on its aftermath, when traumatized residents veer between grace and madness. The fictional Pennsylvania town where the tale is set was once named America’s friendliest, which makes what’s transpired all the more unthinkable. For high school English teacher Anna Crawford, the sense of surreality is even stronger when she’s…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 201810 TITLES TO PICK UP NOWHow to Write an Autobiographical Novelby Alexander CheeA knowing and luminous self-portrait by the author of The Queen of the Night, this memoir in essays explores all the roles—foreign exchange student, waiter, activist, drag queen, tarot reader—that helped Chee clear his path to celebrated writer.In the Shadow of Statuesby Mitch LandrieuThe way forward “starts with telling the truth about the past,” the New Orleans mayor writes in this impassioned reconciliation of Southern identity. Such truth telling spurred his call for the takedown of NOLA’s Confederate statues, a decision recounted to rousing effect here.Propertyby Lionel ShriverTwo novellas and ten stories by the author of We Need to Talk About Kevin skewer the absurdities of materialism, wherein possessions substitute for meaning, and power is exerted by, say, being 30 years old and…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018GALL IN THE FAMILY?EVERY FAMILY is a delicate system, with its own unresolved issues and what I call “hight-witch” areas that can’t be discussed. The greater your family’s level of anxiety, the lower its tolerance for differences. I remember one family who stopped speaking to each other because some of them sold Amway products, and the others refused to use them.Right now we’re all swimming in a soup of anxiety—about jobs, healthcare, the future of our planet—and even solid families are feeling the strain. That state of chronic stress disrupts our ability to empathize and solve problems. Folks become polarized in extreme positions and yo-yo between cutting each other off and calling each other out. We see the other person through a very narrow lens, focusing only on her perceived shortcomings instead of…2 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018NO NEWS IS BAD NEWSSINCE THE DAWN of cable news networks, it’s been growing more difficult to separate reporting from retorting. “With a 24-hour schedule to fill, the networks built many prime-time programs around the talk-show format, often to create debates,” says Amy Mitchell, director of journalism research at Pew Research Center. The trend continued in the digital era, when bloggers could offer commentary-style “news” with no reporting at all. Now, according to a 2017 Gallup-Knight Foundation survey, almost half of Americans say there’s so much bias in the news that it’s hard to decipher the facts. Strict partisans are more certain they can’t be misled by slanted news coverage: Those who are “very liberal” or “very conservative” are the most likely to be “very confident” that they can sort fact from opinion.ONLY 27…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018THIS IS USHISTORY ISN’T A SET OF OBJECTIVE FACTS. IT’S A SUBJECTIVE STORY, CURATED BY THE PEOPLE WHO LIVED IT, AND THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER STORIES THAT HAVEN’T BEEN TOLD.IF ANYONE PROVES this country can draw strength from its differences, that person would be Lin-Manuel Miranda. Raised in New York City by parents who came from Puerto Rico, he turned the life of Founding Father Alexander Hamilton into a groundbreaking hip-hop musical that has moved and inspired Americans of all ethnicities and ages. The winner of 11 Tonys and the 2016 Pulitzer Prize for Drama, Hamilton is set in a time of bitter political rivalry; it’s also a story of patriotism and hope. Recently I sat down with Miranda to discuss our own divided times and how we can move forward.OW:…5 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018WE FEEL YOUR PAINAccording to our poll at Oprah.com—which drew more than 1,300 responses from Republicans, Democrats, and independents—the partisan struggle is really hitting home. If you’re in the thick of it, take comfort that you’re not alone—and heed this presumably hard-won advice from reader Lesley Rahner of Louisville, Kentucky: “Never discuss religion or politics over a glass of wine.”“I am black and my husband is white. I thought we saw eye to eye, but lately talks about race are beginning to divide us.”—JASMINE YORK, St. Louis“I’M AMAZED BY HOW MY FRIENDS AUTOMATICALLY JUDGE PEOPLE WITHOUT LISTENING TO THEIR VIEWPOINTS. I AM A LIBERAL DEMOCRAT AND HAVE TOLD THEM THAT I BELIEVE IN PROTECTING THE BORDERS (BECAUSE IT’S THE LAW), BUT THEY AUTOMATICALLY ASSUME I WANT OPEN BORDERS.”—STEPHANIE GOINS, Lake Villa, Illinois“I have…1 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018LET’S STAY TOGETHERIN DECEMBER 2016, ten Trump voters and ten Clinton voters gathered in South Lebanon, Ohio, to hash out their fears, hopes, and resentments. It was a brave experiment hosted by an organization called Better Angels, which has since held more than 40 workshops nationwide using communication principles drawn largely from marriage counseling. Better Angels’ founder and president, David Blankenhorn, and senior fellow William Doherty, a marriage and family therapist, offer a few lessons that might just save our relationships.IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO.“PEOPLE USUALLY COME in to counseling wanting their partner to change, but both sides have a role in the problem,” says Doherty. “When they can admit that, we’re hitting pay dirt.” At the beginning of each workshop, both “Reds” and “Blues” talk about the stereotypes commonly leveled against…3 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018work out YOUR DIFFERENCESPERHAPS YOU’RE WONDERING, Why should I speak to people with terrible politics? They’re irrational and evil! Actually, (1) you sound a bit irrational yourself, and (2) the other side probably isn’t evil.We’re all subject to cognitive distortions, especially when it comes to our fundamental beliefs, says social psychologist Jonathan Haidt, who studies the moral roots of our political beliefs. The interactive app OpenMind, developed by Haidt and his team, helps us understand why we form certain opinions and how we can have more constructive conversations. Try opening your own mind with these exercises adapted from the free app; for more, visit openmindplatform.org.BREAK OUT OF THE MATRIXHave you ever read an op-ed or heard a politician’s speech and thought, What an idiot?Of course you have—you’re human. Each of us looks at…3 min
O, The Oprah Magazine|May 2018What I Know for SureA ‘MASS SHOOTING GENERATION’ CRIES OUT FOR CHANGE. I’m looking at the morning headlines and the faces of children looking back at me. Children who will never know life on this earth beyond a last moment of terror. At their school. Yet another school.When I was a young journalist in Baltimore, assigned to cover a drunk-driving accident, the death of a single person was enough to merit a lead position on the evening news. But over the years, the amount of death and destruction had to be ever greater to register with people. Eventually it would take seven children on a school bus coming back from Christmas caroling to make the top of the news. Until along came MADD, formed by a group of moms who’d had enough. And were…2 min
